4 Lessons on Building Intergenerational Wealth
/Last month, I told you that one of the pictures posted on my vision board - a Four generations trip - came to fruition over the summer. If you missed my short blurb in my September 13th blog on thinking positively about your wealth, I said that “my grandmother, mother, daughter, and I spent 2 days in NYC enjoying time with each other. It was simply unforgettable.”
After getting our pics back from our photographer and reflecting a bit more, there’s more to share with you from that experience, especially as we approach the season of thanksgiving. Whether you have four generations in your family or not, I think the takeaways can be helpful to you in your own wealth journey. So, here you go - each takeaway is what I learned from each person amongst the four generations:
[From my grandmother] Accept help and generosity when it’s offered to you. When I took my daughter to NYC to spend time with her grandmother and great-grandmother, I figured that their extra hands would be helpful in watching over a three-year-old. Moreover, my mother and grandmother continuously engaged her and watched her when I needed to run an errand or just needed some free time. And, they could also discipline her without much pushback or sulking - amazing! My grandmother also offered to pay a significant portion of the classy dinner that we all had together. When I told her to put her money away, she shot back and said “you better just stay ‘thank you’ and let me help with this bill because I want to.’ I simply said, “yes ma’am.” It can be hard for us to accept help from others, especially when we think we should be in control. The trust is - help is nice and when you freely accept it from others, you and they will be appreciative.
[From my mother] The needs of the oldest and youngest amongst us dictate our activities, especially mothers. My mother welcomes the task of caring for her mother, while always still living into mothering me in a new way - a full-grown adult with her own child - and living into her own newish role as a grandmother. I paid attention to the little acts of care my mother offers to the loved ones in her family. I am digging into Angela Garbes’ new book, Essential Labor. The Amazon description reads: Garbes explores assumptions about care, work, and deservedness. A first-generation Filipino-American, Garbes shares the perspective of her family's complicated relationship to care work, placing mothering in a global context—the invisible economic engine that has been historically demanded of women of color…Garbes contends that while the labor of raising children is devalued in America, the act of mothering offers the radical potential to create a more equitable society. Beyond your own mother, I implore you to be sensitive to the needs of mothers in your workplace, across the street, and in your communities. When we do, our collective wealth will be increased.
[From my daughter] A change in scenery will bring a new perspective. My 3-year-old daughter is pretty much set in her weekly routine as she gets ready for preschool, takes the drive to preschool, attends a full day of preschool with her friends, and then comes home for dinner and a bedtime routine, only to do it all over again. On the weekends, we have our rituals of homemade breakfast beyond cereal and yogurt, church, family time, and playtime. But, when I took her to NYC, she was a bit awestruck. As we walked around Central Park and looped the city blocks on a simple stroll, she couldn’t help but wonder about the horse carriages that galloped past her, chase the city pigeons that lurked on most corners, jump on the hotel beds as if we’d hit the lottery, and express her excitement for the free continental breakfast at the hotel. Her perspective changed, and I would argue that yours will too if you change up your surroundings. Now, you make think that the awe you experience may not be as high as a 3-year-olds, but give it a try. You may surprise yourself.
[From me] View investing in the intangible as a means to generate wealth. While I certainly had tangible expenses to account for during our four-generation trip, there is no amount of money that can give me the memories with my grandmother, mother, and daughter - 4 generations of wealthy girls. I am wealthy simply because of them, and the experience that we had together. We all invested our time and money in an intangible experience that we will never forget. I was re-energized by the experience and bounced into work the next week, especially as I think about the ways in which both my mother and grandmother worked to give me the opportunities I had growing up. Remember, wealth represents both your intangible and tangible gains. Please invest in the intangible heavily, as it may give you the energy you need for both your professional and personal lives.
A Wealthy Girl Corner
I want to encourage you to connect across the generations that you have in your life. Here’s how much fun you can have and make intangible memories…
